Papa Bouilloire Goes to Oxford, Chapter the Third
For those of you kind enough to have taken an interest in my little adventures I must apologies for the tardiness of my next installment, particularly as I have left you in such breathtaking suspense over the matter of the Jacket. My only excuse is that a late dinner involving an enormous pig knuckle led to consequences too unsuitable for the delicate sensibilities of the ladies to endure and rendered me incapable of writing sooner.
The day began with less brightness, and the internet had already darkly hinted at a change in the weather. The deer skittered nervously about the greensward as an icy breeze toyed playfully with the climbing roses profligately growing up the college walls. What did these ominous portents mean?
That’s right! “Another day in paradise!”
Ever dutiful, my esteemed colleague and I set off at 7.45 to see the Balliol students at their breakfast, and the fullness of their plates and the radiance of their countenances left us in no doubt that all was well. One of the students did however confess that his heart yearned for BBQ sauce and we added its procurement to the extensive list of professional duties required of us. (See list below)
List of Duties
1. Buy BBQ sauce
We then departed for a stroll down a way as yet untaken and espied before us a huge grassy knoll which transpired to be the remnants of Oxford Castle. As it was only early, access was denied, but we agreed to return and lash out on the pound entry fee to climb to the top. Ever frugal, we decided that rather than buy breakfast out, we would go to Sainsbury’s and buy some delicious viands to invigorate ourselves at the start of each day.
In we traipsed and, overwhelmed by the choice and remarkably affordable prices, rapidly filled our basked with the necessaries. Yoghurt, special K, some fruit, cheese and and also 2 matching white mugs, cereal bowls and plates as we only had a cup and a teaspoon in the College. BBQ sauce was also procured after much searching
Much pleased with our selection and the knowledge that we were saving the families wads of cash we tripped smilingly up to the counter. A sweet lady started scanning the goods which we were paying for together. As I carefully packed our yoghurt and china I noticed her smiling indulgently at us both.
Oh horror! The Yoghurt! The Matching China! The cheeses! The Special K! The women thought we were a couple!
There was my more Bohemian companion in a tight black t-shirt with tattoos peeking out under his sleeves and I in a charming ensemble of a pair of brogues, my blue piped denim sports jacket, smartly turned up jeans and matching French Connection flat cap… How dare she think such a thing! Was she mad?
Fortunately at this point and for no apparent reason, my fellow teacher decided he wanted to go back to the College and leave me to my own devices and rapidly disappeared down a street with all of our groceries leaving me entirely to myself for the rest of the day.
If you have not read the previous installments here they are.